When you “feel” something, the first thing you should do is take a second to analysis why you are “feeling” the way you are. If you are feeling sad, happy, excited or reserved, remember that your environment is a contributing factor to your feelings. You have control of how you respond to your feelings.
A girl finally got her dream job and on her first day of work she felt excited. She was smiling and happy to see and meet her new co-workers. While getting ready to leave for the day, one of her new co-workers decided to voice her opinion about the new girl’s perceived happiness of working there. The co-worked made a rude remark in front of other co-works. The new girl started to feel anxiety and negativity, which made her question if she even belonged there. Instead of acting on the feelings, the new girl decided to say aloud to herself “I can do anything I put my mind to, I earned this position and I know that I have self-control.” Then the new girl turned to the co-worker whom said the rude remark and said “It was a pleasure to meet you, I look forward to working with you in the future.” The new girl walked to her car grinning with the understanding that she didn’t let her “feelings” control her, instead she decided to exercise her self-control over her own “feelings.”
We have the ability to be reactive in a negative way or a positive way. Be careful to not let “feelings” rule your life. You have the power of self-control.
In a world full of upset and disappointment, it is encouraging to see positive views of your perception of what the world could be. Having worked for several large corporations and small businesses, the realization has come to me that it isn’t what you do – but how you do it. When you realize how invaluable you are, you begin to see the most positive sides of everything.
The other week I had the honor of meeting a complete stranger during an interview for a business contract. In perfect hindsight it seemed that we had no common denominator with one another. But, it is always important to look past what you see. This young woman shared her hardships with me about her starting to “go natural” with her hair. She asked about my natural hair journey and advice on what she could do. I answered her questions, but it was also put on my heart to tell her about my personal and emotional depletion with my natural hair journey. I told her how I have received many adverse comments and snide remarks about my hair and how the comments often made me feel. I shared how it was one of the hardest things I had ever done, yet one of the most freeing things I had done for my Spirit. She started crying uncontrollably and I asked her if I could give her a hug. She agreed, and then we both sobbed together for a few minutes.
For a moment we shared the same pain, discord and upset about “going natural.” But, it was much more than that, we sobbed about not being accepted by society, low self-esteem and our overall feeling about how our “nappy” hair made us feel. She apologized, for being “silly” and crying. I told her that it wasn’t silly, and that sometimes you just need for someone else to simply understand your pain. She thanked me and I was honored to have shared that moment of human empathy with her.
There is freedom in sharing the truth, no matter how painful it may seem. If we took a little more time to share in each others pain, the healing for each one of us could infect the world with more love.